


Let Me Go

by thealphagate_archivist



Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: Alternate Universe, Drabble, Drama, Episode Fix-it: s05e21 Meridian, First Time, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-05-31
Updated: 2006-05-31
Packaged: 2019-02-02 06:16:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 772
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12721194
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thealphagate_archivist/pseuds/thealphagate_archivist
Summary: Daniel has asked one too many times





	Let Me Go

**Author's Note:**

> Note from the archivists: this story was originally archived at [The Alpha Gate](https://fanlore.org/wiki/The_Alpha_Gate), a Stargate SG-1 archive, which began migration to the AO3 in 2017 when its hosting software, eFiction, was no longer receiving support. To preserve the archive, we began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in November 2017. We e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are this creator and it hasn't transferred to your AO3 account, please contact us using the e-mail address on [The Alpha Gate collection profile](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/thealphagate).

  
Author's notes: Thanks again to my beta, Kay. Your time and patience is, as ever, greatly appreciated.  


* * *

I turned to look back at the young scientist I had come to respect while on the short mission to Abydos. I felt myself standing on a precipice. This moment would mark a path taken.

But Daniel wanted to stay. He had a new wife, a new life to live. I owed him both my soul and my life. The least I could do was give him his.

“Let me go, Jack,” Daniel requested.

“Okay, Daniel.” Daniel turned and walked away. I shivered as I felt a chill settle over me.

~*~

I heard the logic in capturing Apophis. I knew he could be a valuable source of information, both in finding Daniel’s missing family, and also as a tool in the war against the Goa’uld. But I heard the passion in Daniel’s voice, and the undertones. It frightened me. I heard, beneath the logic, the desperation, and trembled with the premonition. I would lose Daniel this way.

Carter was clearly against it, and Teal’c was on the line. But one look into those expressive blue eyes, at the reminder of the promise I had made, and my instincts abandoned me.

“Let me go, Jack,” Daniel requested.

“Okay, Daniel.” Daniel turned and moved away. I felt awash in a profound sorrow.

~*~

How could I have left Daniel to cover our six? It had been a bad command decision, and now I faced another. Leave him behind? No! I don’t care if we were all going to die anyway. We would go out together! As the team we were!

But Daniel would slow us down. He knew it. I knew it. The chances of any of us surviving were pretty much nil. I couldn’t afford to let my emotions ruin the chance of success for this mission. I could see all my thoughts echoed in his eyes. He wanted to give us a fighting chance. He wanted me to find his wife in his stead. I could see and hear it all. A promise had been asked, and given.

“Let me go, Jack,” Daniel requested.

“Okay, Daniel.” Daniel closed his eyes, and sank away from me. I felt the loss of hope.

~*~

I watched as Daniel reached out to his dead wife. Teal’c had done the right thing. It was a choice between Daniel’s life, and a slim chance that Sha’re could be rescued again some day. No light affair, and I did not envy Teal’c the choice.

I knew Daniel was angry, but to leave us? Where would he go? What would he do? Who would look after him? Made sure he slept and ate? No one. He would be alone. Without Teal’c, Carter, and me, he would be lost to the world. Sha’re, in death, had taken from him the light that guided us all.

“Let me go, Jack,” Daniel requested.

“Okay, Daniel.” Daniel returned to packing his office. A darkness descended on me, and I felt suddenly a loneliness as I never had before.

~*~

I woke up, sweating and gasping. Trembling from the dream that had set a cold fear deep in my bones. What a nightmare! Daniel, diving through a plate glass window. Daniel, dying and bleeding from radiation poisoning. Each image was worse than the last. Finally, Daniel, asking me to let him go. And then he was gone, and there was nothing.

Without his light, my world had gone dark. It was cold, empty and lonely. I had lived in sadness before, but only once had it been so deep, so all consuming. Daniel had saved me from that. Could I save him? My path was being laid out for me, and I had a choice to make.

~*~

Daniel wanted to talk to Jonas while the rest of us toured the city. I knew he wanted another chance to try and make the Kelownans see the dangers in building the mass weapon. I almost let him go. 

And then, there it was. That precipice again. I had one foot over it, and the wrong step would leave me in darkness forever.

“Let me go, Jack,” Daniel requested.

“No, Daniel.” Daniel smiled at me, and I felt all the beauty and goodness of the universe shining through to me. I was alive in a way I hadn’t been for what seemed like a very long time. I knew why. I had only to ask, and that universe would be mine. “Stay.”

“Okay, Jack.” Daniel moved closer to me, and I felt happiness, as, at long last, I walked away from the edge.


End file.
